It is still deeply ingrained in the male psyche to divide women into several categories: mothers, sisters, wives and Others. Priorities are set in their minds almost in the same order. The truth is, women should not be categorised, just loved.
Some men still stick to the rule, particularly during their dating period, that the other women are divided into those for “those things” and the ones to stand in front of a lighted candle on their patron saint’s day. In translation, that means they divide them into those for sex and the ones they can bring home to meet their mothers.
Men, the proponents of this narrow division, also tend to be narrow-minded when it comes to their mental capacity, and insecure about their sexual performance. While still young they are driven by their lower brain to chase the ones for “those things”, and when the marrying age approaches or when their mother starts nagging them to give her a grandchild, they strive to use their upper brain and catch the one to stand in front of a lighted candle.
>>Let love smear you, sex taint you and a relationship shake you to the core.<<
On the other hand, some women, conditioned by this narrow division, especially the ones with a narrow-minded approach to their own sexuality and even lower self-esteem, hold the opinion that their chances of getting married would be practically non-existent if they had sex on the first date, or if they showed openly what they liked and could do in bed. When their biological clock starts ticking causing an alarming stabbing sensation in their uteruses, and the famous veteran title of an “old maid” starts looming on the time horizon, they completely lose their power of reasoning and their ability to select a suitable partner.
So, when the one who has started the chase with his lower brain hunts down the one to show to his mother, a serious relationship happens. She keeps silent about her sexuality and won’t let loose so that she would not be labelled as a slut, and he does not even try to improve their sex life because such things are only done with those for ‘’those things’, never with the one who will, God willing, be bearing his children next year. Then they delude themselves into thinking they are happy together, then they start convincing themselves they are happy, after which they start to remember how happy they used to be and finally they break up.
– The cause?
– Their love has lost its spark.
You idiots, your love hasn’t lost its spark, it never had it. You did not cultivate it, nurture it, you did not cuddle it. You did not understand it, you did not trust it, you did not sweeten it. Rife with all those prejudices, fears, labels and society’s pressure, it did not even manage to get on its feet. You killed it in your minds before you took each other’s hand. You did the same thing with sex. You did the same with your relationship. Let love smear you, sex taint you and a relationship shake you to the core. Let yourselves be carried away by feelings so big that you feel so small while, at the same time, they give you so much strength that you feel on top of the world. Only then will you be able to love like it’s the first time, fuck like it’s the last. And live this short life like it will be eternal.
Translated from the Serbian by Svetlana Milivojević-Petrović
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Ovaj post je dostupan i na: Serbian
